Hi. It’s me, Adam. I’ve been doing some introspection lately, and because this is cheaper than therapy, I thought I’d share. First, let me get some disclaimers and presuppositions out of the way.
I’ve been a Christian for about 32 years now. I’ve been preaching, teaching, and pastoring for 20. I share a lot of memes, stories, and sermons about what it means to follow Jesus. I am not shy in believing that everyone should follow Jesus.
I have deep theological convictions, shaped by the Bible, that all of us are in a broken world, and that we, ourselves are broken. But I also believe that God, in His gracious love and mercy, is in the business of putting us back together. He takes the lump of clay that is mankind and shapes it into something beautiful. He, as the creator, sees something in us that we cannot see. He sees the potential. He sees a calling and a purpose in us that we cannot begin to see in ourselves. And all of this requires us to be made right with God, which is only possible through His Son, Jesus Christ.
I believe that Jesus really lived, really died on the cross, and really rose from the dead on the third day. I believe this based on history, logic, and faith. I believe in the teaching of the apostles and early church, men and women who were dramatically changed by the Spirit of the Living Christ. I believe that there is an existence outside of this life, an eternity, spent either with our Creator or separated from Him.
Because of this, I believe that Jesus Christ and His Church and your faith in Him or lack thereof, is the most important thing in existence.
The longer I follow Jesus, the more I study, and pray, the more I am convicted to live like Him. And this is where I am struggling. My “life verse” (or one of them) is found in Matthew 9:36, which says, “When He [Jesus] saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.“
Jesus modeled perfectly what it means to love people, to have compassion on them, and to still insist that they be changed by God. This is perhaps demonstrated best in John 8:1-11, where Jesus told the woman, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and sin no more.” John 3:17-18 tells us, “For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through Him. Whoever believes in Him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because they have not believed in the name of the only Son of God.”
We see that Jesus demonstrated this kind of unconditional love and compassion throughout His time on earth. It was out of this compassion that He called people to leave their old ways of life and to follow Him. It is this same compassion that He calls all of us today to give up everything and follow Him.
But sometimes, we who are His messengers today fail. And we fail big. For too much of my life, I have been a Christian Jerk. A Sanctified stumbling block. A holier-than-thou high-and-mighty. I cannot help but think back to my high school years and early days of ministry when I had zeal but no compassion. I had knowledge but little wisdom and little love to spare. If you didn’t live up to my standards, I often thought less of you. If you didn’t agree with me, you were wrong and I too often let you know it.
And if you knew me from back then, I need you to hear me now: I am deeply sorry.
I was too often concerned with winning arguments than I was with winning souls. I was more focused on being right than I was on living right. And while I was still struggling with secret sins in my heart, as long as I didn’t commit the sin you committed, I thought I was good and you were bad. Friends, that is not the way of Jesus. I shudder to think of the people that I may have turned away from the Savior based on my behavior. I pray that God has used other, better, witnesses to overcome my sanctimonious squabbling.
The truth is, there is nothing I can do about the past, nor is there anything you can do about it. We can learn from it, and strive to do and be better.
So, why bring all this up now?
I bring it up because our world desperately needs Jesus. Western Society is collapsing all around us because people on the left and the right, culturally and politically, have exchanged truth for lies, preferred realities, and shouting matches over logic, reason, and conversation. We chant pithy sayings that are, upon closer examination, poppycock. Now, more than ever, we need people to engage with a broken world with the light and truth of Jesus.
And when I do engage with you, and we disagree… You need to know, I need you to know, that I am no longer Adam the jerk. I am more and more aware each day of my own shortcomings and failures. And each day I am learning more and more to lean on Jesus. I am finding out in new ways how His love covers a multitude of sins. And that is why we cannot, as Christians, stay silent. We must, in love, share the truth of Jesus Christ to a world that is in darkness, even unaware of it, without Him.
His love compels me, compels us, to share with the world. And there will be times when you and I are misunderstood. There will be times that despite our best and most compassionate efforts, we are labeled as bigots, jerks, Bible thumpers, and ignorant. There will be times that we will be called judgemental, even when we appeal to the righteous judge, Jesus Christ.
People will be offended by the message of Jesus. He has told us that in His word. But, please, take a lesson from me, and don’t give people any more of a reason to not follow Jesus. Let the only offense be the Cross of Christ.
And friends, the same Jesus who has and who continues to change me, is able and willing to change you too.
Adam Will 